Navigating Your Finances During And After Divorce

The true cost of divorce is its effect on the family and the emotional chaos it causes for everyone involved, but it's also very costly financially. Knowing your rights and obligations, and how to protect yourself, can make it less expensive and perhaps a little less painful.

Child Support:

-If there are children involved, their well-being should be both parents' primary concern.

-Paying spouse should not feel as though ex-spouse is squandering child support since it takes a lot of money to feed, keep a roof over heads, provide clothing, etc.

-Only half of all court-ordered child support is paid, and only half of that is paid in full.

-Withholding of visitation rights shouldn't be used as a weapon to try to force a non-paying parent to cough up the child support payments. Don't use money as a weapon against your ex-spouse, or your children will end up as casualties.

Division of Property:

Colorado divorce law is based on "equitable distribution," which does not necessarily mean an "equal" distribution. The court will consider many tangibles and intangibles in coming to a decision on how to divide assets. For those of you not in the state of Colorado, be sure to check with an attorney about your state’s divorce laws to make sure you’re compliant.

-Divorce can have more of a financial impact on your future than buying a house or planning for retirement.

-Don't willingly give up what you have a right to, especially if you have custody of children, since your financial situation directly impacts them as well.

-Don't assume your attorney will protect you financially. In many cases it's worthwhile to spend the money to consult a financial planner to assess the real value of your assets.

-Consider/plan for tax liabilities as well

-When in doubt consult a financial planner

Marital Assets:

Know the value of your marital assets.

  • House
  • Cars
  • Boats
  • Retirement plans
  • Cash value life insurance policies
  • Stocks, bonds, mutual funds
  • Stock options
  • Tax refunds
  • Accumulated vacation pay
  • Frequent flier miles
  • Loans to others
  • Artwork or antiques
  • Collectibles, tools

Calculate how much child support will be needed to cover food, housing, day care, clothes, school supplies and activities, and other expenses.

Get written confirmation from your spouse's employer of your spouse's salary, vacation balance, bonuses, and stock options.

Protect yourself for the future:

-Make sure to cancel any joint bank accounts and open individual accounts

-Notify your creditors of your change in marital status

-When divorce is final and assets have been legally divided, change names on house deeds, stocks and bonds, and car titles, as necessary. Change beneficiaries on investments, retirement plans, life insurance policies, and savings accounts.

-Update your will. Check your credit report

-Prepare a crisis savings account. For emergencies such as medications for current illness, car repairs, lost days of work staying home with sick children, house repairs, etc. Make sure that it’s in an account that can be readily available without penalties for withdrawals.

-Start savings accounts for college and extras such as vacations, special trips, and large purchases. Individual accounts are best.

Break Free from Destructive Financial Cycles After Divorce:

Oftentimes we have destructive thoughts about finances. Over 50% of the divorces in the U.S. are a result of poor money management and the destructive thoughts that perpetuate them.

We have weird and wrong thinking about money for the most part. In Stephen De Silva’s book entitled “Money and the Prosperous Soul”, he talks about certain situations in our lives that cause us to sometimes develop wrong thinking towards money.

1. I can’t/don’t handle money well

2. The worlds oppression seem bigger than God’s kingdom

3. A spirit of poverty or lack

4. I don’t deserve or qualify for a job that makes great money

5. Generational patterns/curses

These are artificial limits and they are lies from the pit of hell. They are designed to minimize and diminish us. Don’t believe them! Money is a tool....that’s the long and the short of it. It most often reveals the issues of our souls.

In Matthew 6:19-21 it says “Do not store up for yourselves’ treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. 20 But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moths and vermin do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.“

I share this information with you not to alarm you or overwhelm you, but to equip you as possible to avoid potentially more trauma. It will only help you with the healing process moving forward.

The healing process can be smoother when going through the divorce process is smoother.

Want to dive deeper into this, and learn how having God at the center of this even with our finances will bring calmer seas? Then I invite you to grab a free copy of my book, Destiny After Divorce. It is the ebook version so you will be able to have it instantly.

Just simply click the link below to start the healing journey together.

Free copy of Destiny After Divorce

Yours in healing,


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