Don’t be hard on yourself. Grief after divorce is a completely expected process of healing.
I know that you want to feel better already. The pain is so heavy and the brokenness feels like it will never go away.
I see you fighting every day to keep your head above water. Trying to pick up the pieces of your shattered heart. I see you struggling to hold on to hope. But I also see your strength.
I see your resilience. I see your determination. And I know that, no matter how dark this moment may be, you will find a way to make it through.
Grief After Divorce Is Just Letting Go Of What Was
Recovering from divorce is not always fast. It’s a process of letting go of what once was, and starting anew. And for many, this process can take months, even years.
So don’t be hard on yourself if you’re not “healed” overnight. Just as it takes time to build a relationship, it takes time to heal from one that’s broken.
Give yourself the grace and space to grieve, without putting pressure on yourself to move on too quickly. In time, you’ll emerge from this chapter of your life stronger and wiser than before.
You see, it’s common to think and believe that grief and pain shrink over time but what really happens is that we grow around our grief. That’s right, there is so much happening beneath the surface that you don’t even realize.
So if you find yourself still grieving long after everyone around you thinks you should have moved on, take heart. You’re not alone. And more importantly, take your time.
There’s no need to rush this process. After all, healing comes at its own pace – sometimes slow, sometimes fast – but always sure. So take a deep breath and take your time. You’ll get there eventually. And when you do, you’ll be all the stronger for it.
Time Box Your Grief
If you are that one that is reading this and going in and out of grief emotions one tip that typically helps so many I work with is what I like to call time boxing. All that simply is establishing a certain amount of time to let yourself freely sit in the current emotions. This allows you to experience what you are currently feeling without any guilt or pressure. Then once the time is up it is about leaving those emotions in that space.
This is important because we can’t let emotions run us in situations like this. So, when we provide space to fully feel them and then step away from them it keeps a healthy boundary.
What you will find is over time you will need these grief time boxes less and less and when you do you won’t even go the full time.
What I want to make sure for you is you are healing from this in a healthy way that doesn’t lead to you repeating this or holding you back from fully living your life.
Something traumatic like this can change you in a way that dims your light. That is exactly what I help you avoid. As traumatic as a divorce is, it doesn’t have to alter your life in a negative way when you are surrounded by the right people and equipped with the right tools.
So, I am giving away my Divorce Healing Journal to make sure you leave this blog moving in the right direction. We can read all we want, but when it is followed by action the outcomes we want follow.
My gift to you from someone that has walked your path and knows what it is like to be where you are right now.